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I am ambivalent about this. A friend of mine was found dead in his house last year, a week or three after he died. Many of his closest friends had moved away to other continents; others were trying to respect his desire for privacy by not dropping in unannounced. He had his problems, but he was very well loved. But it wasn't enough.

I agree with you that it's important that we live our lives in such a way as to create happiness; I think it's okay whether the happiness is for ourselves or for others.

But I think that the most effective way to do that is to carry forward the advancement of human knowledge, because ignorance is the source of unhappiness. It's worth depriving oneself of a bit of day-to-day pleasure if that's what it takes to develop your capacities to the point where you can make a real contribution. As usual, I want to point to Richard Hamming's "You and Your Research": http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~robins/YouAndYourResearch.html



I'm sorry to hear about your friend.

I see, and appreciate, your link to Hamming's article and raise you Samuel Beckett's Krapp's Last Tape in counterbalance: https://www.msu.edu/~sullivan/BeckettKrapp.html


That's a pretty depressing story, but very powerful, too, and a very effective counterbalance.


I'm reminded of Paul Erdos. Never married, perhaps he died alone. But he never settled either.


Death in the middle of a lecture is hardly "alone."


We obviously went to different universities.




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