> after they are successful in life...

where the definition of success is based on the parent's perception of what success means.

The child's opinions nor desires don't come into the picture.

This is actually a common mindset in countries where a generation remembers famine-level poverty.

I once discussed with some friends from various backgrounds on the merits of doing higher education or going in for your passion after high-school and a friend from a remote countryside in Mexico explained "well, for me it was straighforward. Either I go to university, or I do farming my all life."

Ignoring the extremes, why would a child's opinion be taken into account in a situation like this? What experiences does the child have that makes their opinion valid in parenting issues?

Because respecting a child's autonomy leads to emotionally healthy, happier and more successful adults?

> What experiences does the child have that makes their opinion valid in parenting issues?

Well, their own. Those experiences likely give them better insight into their own preferences than an outsider, even at a young age.

Ignoring those preferences suppresses their individuality. It also reduces the chances of them finding something they're uniquely good at, restricts development to the parent's biases, and kneecaps entire suites of decision-making skills and development.

As a young child, talking from the single digits, I knew I wanted to build video games. That desire eventually grew into an above average career in software development. While I don't do video game development other than some small side projects, that's a choice I've made as an adult due to the current video game industry.

It's the child's own future, so when possible the parents should let the child's own desires lead them toward a successful future. That is a hard balance to strike, because the parent has to turn their child's desire into more general skills that can be useful even if the child's dream isn't realistic or the best outcome.

I wonder how my life would've been if my parents got me involved in computers and programming when I was 8 instead of ignoring it and waiting until I taught myself at 15.

Only the child knows their own feelings.

The depressing thing is this type of kiasu parenting actually takes the child further away from success. Children learn through play. A good technician doesn't make a good inventor and let's face it the people we remember as successful are all in the inventor mould.

Many people say that yet a large number of successful doctors, lawyers, engineers, and other skilled professionals have come from that type of parenting.