So I have no problem with network storage. I have a cost problem (the project I'm working on is not intended to make a bunch of money and I'm trying to keep costs low so I can keep prices extremely low). What you're describing would functionally be even more expensive than just using S3 directly, if it were to be done in AWS or in GCS.

Right now the leading (uncomfortable) solution is probably DigitalOcean Spaces and a little bit of prayer.